Greetings Friends and Family,
It has been many moons since I have written and now 2019 has come to a close, the rains have come to quench the dry land, the hills are turning green and we have begun the transition into 2020. I hope you are out there enjoying the clear cool days and changing skies, cozying up with books and furry friends and otherwise making peace with the short days and long nights of winter.
As for me, I wrapped up the year, wrapped up my 4o’s, and now am forging my way into the next decade. I feel encouraged as the full moon illuminates the potency of this phase of my life.
Last year brought meaningful completion, rewarding renewal, as well as fresh beginnings to my life. I focused my actions and intentions on dance and found myself pleasantly swept away by the strong current of creativity and arts in Santa Cruz. I performed in two dance concerts, organized and produced Wildance in the Arizona desert, took classes at Cabrillo Community College & UCSC, received my Associate’s Degree in Dance from Cabrillo, made countless new connections, and was happily reunited with several old friends.
2019 gifted me with physical experiences, pleasant and challenging; this body morphs and recreates itself continuously and so I continue to learn how to live in it, how to care for it, how to compassionately honor and acknowledge it, as I walk on this embodied path. As some of you are intimately aware, menopause and the years preceding ARE NO JOKE. Nothing less than a tumultuous adventure from stability to fragility and back again, what a ride.
A year of discernment and dedication, my body complained unexpectedly at the most inopportune moments, recovered from invisible injury with surprising efficiency and overall revealed miraculous resilience. I feel more than ever the importance of that long ago vow I made to myself to do my best to care for this physical creation I inhabit. I am here to have a grand and deeply embodied life.
Today I feel resilient and strong, embracing the stamina that comes from riding out a storm with awareness and humility; relying on self-compassion and mindfulness, as well as leaning heavily on the support of my teachers, friends, family, doctors, healers, witches and wise ones that have gone before. It is wondrous the difficulties we can tolerate, accept and grow from when we have the support we need.
I am grateful for my courage and confidence; for my resilient spirit, for the mysterious spark within me that keeps me going. I am grateful for all of you! For all the shining of light and sharing of darkness that we do together. Keeping it real. Staying connected. Knowing that we are all part of one big family; humans, creatures, earth, the universe and all that we can only imagine is beyond.
This year I feel mysterious. I sense the mystery, the unknown always near. I hold that feeling with tenderness and curiosity as I continue onward. What do you sense for yourself in the coming year? Where do your curiosities lie?
May you find a taste of peace, or excitement, or adventure, whatever it is you seek in the mystery of living!